Welcome To The World Katelyn!

HELLO!!!! We are so so excited to tell you all about our sweet baby girl Katelyn June Hildebrant. Right now we’re sitting in our living room which is finally a bit tidy after oh so many days. Matthew is singing to our little June Bug. It’s amazing how many goofy songs get sung in this house nowadays. It’s late and we’re sleep deprived, but sustained by the amazing energy that God is giving us. Katelyn thinks this is a fun time to play with Mommy and Daddy and doesn’t see why sleep would be a priority. Oh and now after her nice bath she just made a big lovely poop. Man!! My sister Felicia is such a huge sweetie and is posting this on my blog for me. It’s been a crazy change of schedule since her birth and I know I won’t be around the next for a while, so ya.
Ok so she was born Wednesday June 14 at 12:51 in the lovely afternoon. She weighed 6lbs 6oz and was 19.5 inches long.
So that’s all the general mumbo gumbo, now heres the long and wonderful story of her birth and her life so far. So her due date isn’t until tomorrow. Because she was measuring small I was completely expecting to go overdue, maybe even two weeks. I was not ready at all for her birth. I didn’t realize how unready I was until we got home from the hospital. So on Tuesday night my water broke and a few hours later contractions started. It was a long long night. I threw up a lot (even the delicious peach smoothie Matthew made me). Contractions were very consistent the whole time, but never lasted very long, praise God for that. We called our doula (birth coach), Heather in the morning and she came on over. Contractions were pretty close by the time we waited for what seemed every red light and then a train. But were were finally at the hospital to find out I was already 8 cm dialated, praise God! We hoped to have about 2 hours of labour left and then go home in the morning at the latest. But while I was on the examing table in the hall way signing forms between now very intense contractions, we realized it wasn’t to be so easy. Katelyn was breach, and not only that, her little foot was sticking down there too. I cried and my heart hurt so bad. It was so important to us to have a natural birth and this was such a huge disapointment. I had never even thought about having a C section, it just wasn’t ever an option. We insisted on an ultra sound before doing the C section, but our fears were confirmed. We very quickly had to come to terms with this. From the time we got to the hospital (11:30) until she was born was 1.5 hours. For this hospital to act that fast is just amazing!
Matthew got to get all scrubed up and come to the OR with me, I almost didn’t recognize him. I had to get an epidural and then try to figure our what on earth they were doing to me. It was the weirdest feeling ever! When she was born they took her to a table to get her breathing and everything. This was so hard for me. I had wanted her delivered right onto my bare tummy. I got a quick kiss and then she was whisked away to be with Daddy while I had to stay in recovery. Tears are streaming down my face as a write this, and it’s not just the crazy emotions, it was so painful for me to endure this. I had also wanted to nurse within the first hour (and she was ready, she sucked on Matthews finger the whole time) By the time I got to her she was so tired she just didn’t have it in her. As a result we got a slow and shaky start to nursing (but she’s a little piggy with the milk I pump for her) But tonight was just the most amazing incredible bestest night of my life, she actually nursed for the first time, oh man it was just incredible! So I’m praying that her next feeding will be another huge success. I have to stick in a huge apology here for Ryan and anyone else that is completely sicked out by all this gross talk, sorry but it’s part of the beautiful miricle of life.
Alright, so anyhoo. After the birth we just cuddled our new little girl in our hospital room. We had to stay until Saturday which in the end was probably good for us. The hospital staff was just amazing and it was a good chance for us to relax…..ummm in a weird non sleep kind of way, and to just learn. It’s so so good to be home, and we’re finally feeling a little more settled here. Katelyns stuff was all over the stinkn house, and now it’s at least a little more contained. Actually it’s kinda the other way around, it was all packed up nice so we couldn’t even use it. Now it’s spread all over the house where it needs to be.
I’m getting really tired and it’s just retarded that I’m not in bed, so I’m just gonna talk about the most important stuff for a sec, then I’m gone for another week or so until I get to a computer again. Important stuff: My heart is just so … I don’t know how to explain it. I’m a mom, some of you will understand. Theres something about it that you just can’t explain.

Ok, I’m finishing this up on a different day now. I was getting so grumpy and tired for that last bit. God has been doing amazing things in my life and it’s not right to talk about all that when I’m just grumpy grumpy. I have learned so much about myself in this process. I’ve learned that I’m a control freak (ok I knew that one already, we’ve just been working it out a lot more). I have a really hard time letting people help me. I also get upset when I ‘should’ be doing something, like picking her up and carrying her stuff, but I can’t. I just hate being weak and having to admit it. I have been forced to just be completely weak and dependant on God. I strive to be dependant on God all the time, but I’m learning this lesson in such a huge way right now. I’ve been given this amazing miracle and I cannot be the one who controls her and cares for her every need. She is in Gods hands alone, wow! I really have to remind myself of that all the time. I am getting so much more emotionally balanced. The first few days home from the hospital were pretty rough. I woke up one day and she wasn’t in our house (Daddy was taking care of her at the place my parents were staying). I totally freaked out crying, it was like a panic to find her. That just wouldn’t happen now, it’s all good. I know that’s mostly to do with crazy emotions. But it’s more than that. Katelyn is being taken care of all the time by her creator who loves her so much. Oh that’s another cool thing. To think about how much I love this girl, how I could literally stare at her until I just can’t keep my eyes open (and even then some) To think about what she means to me, then to think God loves me more than that! Wow, that is such a sweet promise. And God loves you guys more than that too. He want’s to just gaze at your face and have you look at him. He wants to care for you in such a stong way, he just needs us to eat and be taken care of. We cannot do it on our own, we would just die. I don’t know if I’m saying all that’s on my heart, it’s just so full of joy. I just wanted to share with you guys our little June Bug and what Gods doing in our lives. I definitely didn’t talk enough about how God is blessing me. My husband is the most amazing man ever. I never expected him to be such an incredible daddy, but then how can I be surprised. Wow just to watch him with her is so beautiful, k now I’m crying again, wow. He is so gentle with her. I wouldn’t be able to function if it wasn’t for him. He never complains and just does everything, oh man. I can’t even put into words how amazing he has been. It really just sounds lame to try to write out what kind of husband and father he is. I hope you at least have a glimmer of understanding. He doesn’t just do little practical things like diaper changes. He takes the initiative and is involved in Katelyns life. He got a nurse at the hospital to teach him to bathe her ‘cause I couldn’t do it. He got to give her her first bath and didn’t let the nurse just do it for him. He is awake and helping at every feeding. He not only reminds me to eat, but brings me food in bed. He is like me and loves organizing stuff, so we’ve been having fun buying baskets and putting away little pink clothes and setting up a diaper station. Mommie no longer has a dressing table for hair and makeup, it’s now for our little princesses bum.
We’re trying to make baby announcements so you can all have a beautiful pic of our girl for your fridge or wherever you put stuff like that. So I seriously gotta get going, and get some sleep while I’m at it. I love you all. Please give out my blog address like crazy to anyone who doesn’t have it, spread the love. Sorry this is so long and kinda unbalanced, you understand. Love you all CIAO!!!